Eeeeeeeee knee seize, new feeling, maybe it’ll go away if I can straighten it out like a Charlie horse…

EEeeeee

Can’t. Not the muscle. What’s wrong? Looks normal… slightly swollen? Maybe I can get up and walk it off…

eeeEEE step shocked in the kneecap, fall back on bed eeep

“Momm!”

“Hey, what’s the matter?”

“Something’s wrong with my knee, it’s seizing up, and I can’t straighten it out.”

“Where does it hurt?”

“In the kneecap.”

“Just the left?”

“The left is worse, but the right feels off too.”
“Okay, let me get you some ice and then I’ll call the doctor.”

eeeeee… least pain at 135-degree bend. Almost four hours since my last percocets, pushtwist the cap and swallow two more. Press the ice pack until puffy red flesh unfeeling prod like someone else’s limb.

“He said he’s not sure what’s wrong, but if it gets unbearable go to the ER and get imaging done, and then get a diagnosis from an orthopedist.”

Anything but the hospital again. Need a break.

“Well I can’t really walk, so I don’t know how I’d get there.”

Need core for crutches, surgical wounds still healing.

“Okay, is it getting worse?”

“No, I think I have it in a comfortable enough position now, and the ice and pain killers are numbing.”

“How can we get you to the bathroom?”

“Could wheel over on the computer chair, maybe put down a rug on the threshold so I don’t get stuck.”

“Okay, I’ll look into getting a wheelchair. Need anything else?”

“Whenever you can, water refill and a snack. Won’t be able to make it upstairs to the kitchen.”

Body stressed from the emergency surgery, inflamed and in revolt. Stoma larger this time and protrudes less making it hard to seal, leaking left and right, permanent state of chchchchch, easier to change it when not digesting, too much shit to deal with. What if my body is rejecting the surgery as a solution, and now my knees are fucked? Colostomy and wheelchair forever? Basically disabled. No more soccer. How would I option command escape? Bridge? Suffer a sea-change, can’t continue back and forth to the hospital forever, parent and drug dependent. At least I can always load the vape, Pwwwhhhuuuhhhh….

and open a new window. 

Reddit, blacked out… huh?

“SOPA and PIPA damage the internet.

today we fight back.”

Wikipedia and Google also down. 

What is the Stop Online Piracy Act?

Who is Aaron Swartz?

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