Bright light reflected by the stiff and straight white linen, aware of warmth, beeps and voices in the background, weight of my head on a hot pillow, tethered body wrapped in bandages, cramped and uncomfortable, but can sit up with help from the bed remote, weak core, no bag now, has to function on its own, innards retied together, feels tight but nnnnnnnmmmmb need to keep it that way… click but try not to use too many painkillers because they tighten the knot and if it doesn’t work this time I might be trapped forever. Door opens, nurse, “Hey, you’re up!”

“Mmhmmm.”

“Feel okay? Your vital signs are all good.”

“Good.”

Need to move to jiggle the knot loose.

“Can you help me get over to the window for a bit?”

“Already, are you sure?”

“Yea, I can slide out of bed.”

“Okay. Let me empty your drains first,” all excrement discharged efficiently with no signs of revulsion. She opened a wheelchair and propped it by my bed, then collected my tethers so not to tangle, “and undo your IPCs…” legs freed, stretttttchhhh, wiggle butt off the bedslide into chair, she pushed me over to the south-facing window, click…

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