click dull the edge emerging from my numbed core nnnnng largest incision yet, from pelvis all the way up past my naval, nerves unpleasant in the dark but the nnnnnngggh pain button is in my hand click. No one here, still night, waiting for movement. Stale taste of sleep nng slowly sit up to sip lukewarm water, no ice because cold constricts, need to loosen the knot, hot tea for clear fluid breakfast, maybe some broth for dinner. What’s that pale light emanating from under the blind? Must be dawn. Can I get over there by myself? Recently detached from catheter and grenade drains… worth it to test myself or wait for someone? Only a dozen steps, “Are you at all independent?” something goads me despite depleted core and no solid food for four days now, must be the salt in the saline. At least see if I can step, if not, back down to bed. Overlight on mmph swing feet over the side and on to the floor, test if they can take weight oof weak, but less for them to carry with my famished frame. Pull the IV power cord to save the couple steps to the outlet, then lean some of my weight on IV pole and hunchwalk…

Step by step

To the chair next to the [window]

Pull back the blinds…

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